Not giving up and tears

I cried today, it is the first time in awhile, but it means that the emotion is returnig, which is good, because me without emotion is really very scary, more scary than me with emotion, don't cringe at the thought, please. So I have been talking to people about my stuff, my situation, my life, all the scary things I think about, feel, what to act on, but know that I can't. The recurring message is "don't give up, and I won't let you" I am so lucky to have these kinds of people in my life, they love, encourage, support, and fight for me, even when I have nothing left in me to do for myself. The other day while trying to pray, I saw a picture of a bunch of people, my friends that were surrounding me, they were standing really close to me, too close, so I was trying to fight them off, when I relaxed, I realized they were keeping me on the path to God, pointing me in the direction of Him, they were trying to help me, I just needed to relax, let them close to me, and walk in the right direction. So now this is what I will try to do, let people in, let them help me, and walk towards God. It is hard, it is painful, but I am not giving up, I am a fighter and have been my whole life, why would I give up now, why would I give up when others won't give up on me??!?!?!?!? So yeah, there seems to be some light coming in this dark season, some air is leaking into the circumstances that suffocate.