BEHOLD!

Wow!!! So much to say, where do I start? The conference was nothing short of amazing. Honored to have worked with some of the most amazing people in the world, humbled by their humility, and willingness to let things get messy so that God could do His stuff. The first morning began with an invitation to go be with God, inside the invitation was a scripture that said something about letting go of the old, and grabbing the new. So the first few days for me personally, were, well, a lot of letting go. These last few months have been, to say the least, tough. I have been struggling with a lot of disappointments, hurt and pain, all of which, God kindly addressed, and asked me to let go of, which with Him (and some friends) I was able to. It was a literal walking off the pain. So after I had let go of the old, I now am left with many questions about what exactly I am to be taking a hold of. I am very excited about the opportunities that have been presented, still praying which ones I am to grab a hold of.

I can look back now and see His faithfulness everyday, even where I could not see it before. There is a new dependency on Him. Revelation of how He has allowed all of these experiences to shape me, and to give me authority to speak to things. If I have never been hurt how can I experience God as a Comforter and tell others about that? Amazingly, every time someone would come up and talk to me during the conference, their words confirmed things that God Himself had already been telling me. Another thing that I am trying to grasp, is to fully live what God has made me to be. There is an awareness of what I am capable of, but to be honest, I am scared to death of it. I am becoming aware that it is not honoring to God, to not live up to what He has created me to be.

Literally days before the conference I moved into a new apartment with some friends!!! It’s cute and nice, and I am loving it, though it is taking some adjustment. Now that the conference is over I am left with my many questions for God, but a renewed sense of hope, and faith. I need to get settled into my new place, I need to get my taxes done, I need answers to my many questions about my future, and I am overwhelmed by the daunting task of communicating, personally, with those that I have neglected for so long, due to my lack of knowing what to communicate, how to communicate it, and really my own lack of desire to communicate anything at all. Truth be told, not much of my circumstances have changed, but a lot of my attitude has changed, and that has made the biggest difference. I am so very grateful, He is so very faithful, and the peace has been restored.